Tha sow a gud oll Faarmer Squeers
Ad geven im tayn liddel Veers.
Tha noos soon reechd tha passun’s eers
Az tha roasuz soa sweetlee blaw. 
Soa oaff at wawns tha passun went
Ta taak ez Tythe woz ez hintent
Ollthoa et woz tha time a Lent..

Says ee, “ If the veer I do not seize,
I’m very sure it would them please
To send instead a mouldy cheese.”

Tha farmer, waatchen im appeer
Sayd ta ez wife, “I graetlee feer
Eez cum ta taak ar lil Tythe veer.”

Down en tha haal woz saeted she
She ad er ‘taynth’ upon er nee
She sterted up - “I’ll lev un see!”

Tha passun enterd an weth gile
a varayus thengs they coosed awile
“ And when’s the christ’ning?” weth a smile.
 “Will passun! thas fer yoo ta sae
Tez yoorse ya naw, as plaen as dae !”
Soa yoo cun plays ta taak un awae.

“ Noa cheeld noa veer, fer doant ee see
Boath cheeld an peg tha taynth doa be
Soa boath er noan yull git frum we!”

Tha passun blushd an flushd en vaen
An stammerd tryen ta hexplaen.
“ Noa cheeld, noa veer!” sayd she agaen.

“ If that’s the case, “ sayd ee, “I fear
I may as well be off from here,
And leave behind the little Vear.”

An soa tha sayen cum ta steck
That “Thoa tha Passun mite chayt Ol Neck,
A Cornish wumman ee niver cud treck.”
Az tha roasuz soa sweetlee blaw. 
 

This was written in Dialect (possibly by Dunstan) and unlike some more modern Dialect tales has the Dialect speakers coming out on top. The Vicar’s voice is left in standard English as it is in the original. However the narration has been put into Dialect in order to add to the mickey taking of the Parson.

Dialect substitutions: coosed for talk’d, ee for he.

 

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